It looks like Henchel thinks he's a joker. This morning was spent with E feeling contractions which died at some point during her afternoon nap. I did my part as the Expectant Father and made a bunch of food (As a means to avoid less desirable Expectant Father chores). Trusty baked Gnocchi and a curry for the week. We're reaching the sad, desperate phase of pregnancy where E is eating spicy food as a means to induce labour.
So after I worked all afternoon making a curry and E had a rest, she decided we should go out for dinner. For a curry. The good news is that Udapi Palace is our new favourite Indian restaurant. Instead of waxing poetic, just imagine all the tick boxes that you have for an Indian restaurant and tick them off. Except for the one involving a 660ml bottle of Cobra because the Palaces only downside is that it's not licensed.
We ordered chili pakoras. E maintains the waiter knew the ulterior motive; I suspect he was amused by white people ordering ridiculously spicy food.
Showing posts with label pregnancy. Show all posts
Showing posts with label pregnancy. Show all posts
12.9.10
11.9.10
T-Minus 2 days
Oops! That didn't go so well. So much for 7-days of non-stop blogging excitement!
Next time I will aim much lower - Maybe two entries in the same week?
All told it's been a reasonably uneventful week. With E now done work she's out and about catching up on things and I'm wrapping up work-related things.
Early Wednesday morning E has some contractions that lasted to mid-day but nothing came out of them (Like, a baby, more specifically)
On Thursday it was suggested to me that we put the plastic sheeting over the mattress since once E hits active labour, there's a fairly strong chance that she will want to do other things. This, as it turns out was great advice as we'd bought the wrong kind of pads. The up-side of this is that we're now well stocked in mattress protectors should wither of us become incontinent overnight.
It's Cabbagefest today. With luck, all the excitement will spurn Henchel to want to get out and see what all the excitement is.
Next time I will aim much lower - Maybe two entries in the same week?
All told it's been a reasonably uneventful week. With E now done work she's out and about catching up on things and I'm wrapping up work-related things.
Early Wednesday morning E has some contractions that lasted to mid-day but nothing came out of them (Like, a baby, more specifically)
On Thursday it was suggested to me that we put the plastic sheeting over the mattress since once E hits active labour, there's a fairly strong chance that she will want to do other things. This, as it turns out was great advice as we'd bought the wrong kind of pads. The up-side of this is that we're now well stocked in mattress protectors should wither of us become incontinent overnight.
It's Cabbagefest today. With luck, all the excitement will spurn Henchel to want to get out and see what all the excitement is.
6.9.10
T-Minus 7 Days
Or, get a bloody move on!
Labour day was spent being productive. Being laborious, so to speak. Sadly, E did not embrace the double entendre of the day and lay a baby.
The birthing ball is fully inflated, as is the tub. A tarp is laid for spills. The hose is still a problem and heating it to stretch it over the faucet did not yield too much of a success but I'm working on it. I've begun to think that we have the thickest faucet in Canada. The bucket's sterile, though. So now it's just a matter of drumming our fingers and waiting. I'm trying to figure out if we've made a mistake by being so prepared - there's nothing to do!
I cleaned the oven for the first time in a year. Is that news? The bloody thing was oozing more grease than a really greasy thing oozing itself out. I've got nothing.
If Henchel hasn't fully engaged yet, he is well on his way as E's belly is a good 2-3cm lower. I've taken to placing my hand on top of her belly to encourage him to use it as a platform to push off of and swim for the light.
Labour day was spent being productive. Being laborious, so to speak. Sadly, E did not embrace the double entendre of the day and lay a baby.
The birthing ball is fully inflated, as is the tub. A tarp is laid for spills. The hose is still a problem and heating it to stretch it over the faucet did not yield too much of a success but I'm working on it. I've begun to think that we have the thickest faucet in Canada. The bucket's sterile, though. So now it's just a matter of drumming our fingers and waiting. I'm trying to figure out if we've made a mistake by being so prepared - there's nothing to do!
I cleaned the oven for the first time in a year. Is that news? The bloody thing was oozing more grease than a really greasy thing oozing itself out. I've got nothing.
If Henchel hasn't fully engaged yet, he is well on his way as E's belly is a good 2-3cm lower. I've taken to placing my hand on top of her belly to encourage him to use it as a platform to push off of and swim for the light.
5.9.10
Oh yeah, the blog
I guess life got in the way a little. Mind you, for the last month, things have been fairly quiet as we wrap up our pre-Henchel lives so I've got no excuse whatsoever.
As for the prenatal classes, things only got worse. The 200$ they cost would have been better spent on tacks and bubblegum.
We went to one more class; the 'fun' one where we did massage and partner-supported poses for the labouring woman. Things went to hell early on when pretty much every suggested massage involved applying tremendous direct pressure to the woman's lower back. On top of the general idiocy involved in doing such a thing, E also has lower back pain with made doing such doctor recommended activities even more dangerous.
We skipped out on the baby bath class, assuming that the half dozen or so parenting books we own, combined with the power of the Internets at our finger-tips would provide us with guidance enough. Besides, the way things were going at the TEGH, they would likely have recommended bathing your newborn in turpentine and drying them with 80-grit sandpaper.
In other blog-related news, I read Jonathan Coe's The House of Sleep. If I was doing a review I'd probably write something trite like "Jonathan Coe is the best author you've never read." But I'm not writing a review. I am, however going to write that it is really, really good. Funny, dark, witty, serious, sad, all the things you want. It also avoids getting into his politics (Which all the other novels of his that I've read seem to do.) for good or ill. Since I agree with his politics, I kind of missed them. The most clever thing about the book is how at once it is your irritating well-plotted X connects to Y which in turn is why Z did this with the kind of poetic justice that does not exist in the real world but also has numerous (Generally hilarious) asides which do nothing to move the plot forward (Pointing out the randomness of life) which balances out the Look-at-me-I'm-so-cleverness of the novel.
I haven't watched any new movies because Blockbuster is about to go bankrupt and gouging its customers. I'm too uppity to rent movies from the library. This will change once Henchel is born and E & I are poor (again).
As this is likely to be my last week as a not-father, I will endeavour to post one entry a day until Henchel flops out. Unlikely, I know but it'll be good practise.
For something.
I guess.
As for the prenatal classes, things only got worse. The 200$ they cost would have been better spent on tacks and bubblegum.
We went to one more class; the 'fun' one where we did massage and partner-supported poses for the labouring woman. Things went to hell early on when pretty much every suggested massage involved applying tremendous direct pressure to the woman's lower back. On top of the general idiocy involved in doing such a thing, E also has lower back pain with made doing such doctor recommended activities even more dangerous.
We skipped out on the baby bath class, assuming that the half dozen or so parenting books we own, combined with the power of the Internets at our finger-tips would provide us with guidance enough. Besides, the way things were going at the TEGH, they would likely have recommended bathing your newborn in turpentine and drying them with 80-grit sandpaper.
In other blog-related news, I read Jonathan Coe's The House of Sleep. If I was doing a review I'd probably write something trite like "Jonathan Coe is the best author you've never read." But I'm not writing a review. I am, however going to write that it is really, really good. Funny, dark, witty, serious, sad, all the things you want. It also avoids getting into his politics (Which all the other novels of his that I've read seem to do.) for good or ill. Since I agree with his politics, I kind of missed them. The most clever thing about the book is how at once it is your irritating well-plotted X connects to Y which in turn is why Z did this with the kind of poetic justice that does not exist in the real world but also has numerous (Generally hilarious) asides which do nothing to move the plot forward (Pointing out the randomness of life) which balances out the Look-at-me-I'm-so-cleverness of the novel.I haven't watched any new movies because Blockbuster is about to go bankrupt and gouging its customers. I'm too uppity to rent movies from the library. This will change once Henchel is born and E & I are poor (again).
As this is likely to be my last week as a not-father, I will endeavour to post one entry a day until Henchel flops out. Unlikely, I know but it'll be good practise.
For something.
I guess.
Post baby Squabbles
According to the book, we're supposed to baby-proof our marriage by figuring out what our top five post-baby squabbles will be and discuss them.
E's predictions:
E's predictions:
- Take a break
- Where Henchel sleeps
- Over/ under stimulation
- Who's turn is it to change the diaper?
- Appropriate dress (too warm / too cool)
- Diet - Meat? Chemicals? How long has it been on the floor?
- Appropriate playing - "You're freaking him out!" "No I'm not!"
- Who gets to hold/ carry Henchel
- Appropriate music - "You're freaking him out!" "No I'm not!"
- Stephen, you're not sticking to the structure!
30.7.10
Prenatal Class #4
As I continue the saga of our shitty prenatal experience, I add a caveat this week: On Wednesday our instructor found out her aunt (Mothers side; of eleven) was sick. She was at the hospital 'till 2AM, didn't sleep 'till 4:30AM. Should have cancelled the class but didn't. Also forgot that this was the pillow/mat week and didn't inform anyone is the first place. In all fairness she and her family were pulling the plug on Friday and she's pretty distraught. She also has a wedding on the weekend and is full of conflicted emotions so she made class number four video night, instead.
Except the connecter cables to the DVD player TV weren't working properly and caused her more anguish. My social worker side came out, wanting to plead with her to cancel the night but, due to frustration and annoyance with the whole shebang, I did not. I figured maybe some one else would. But no one did. So we had class.
E&I had decided this would be our make-or-break class. Spoiler: We chose break. Double spoiler: But we're going back next week because pillow/mat week will be epic!
We watched three happy videos (Her words) to help lighten the mood. The first was on post-pardum depression which writes its own joke.
Then a second video so bland that neither of us remember what it was about. Something to do with gel being put in the baby's eyes.
After the break, video number three was a repeat. The teacher had left the class and there was that whole awkward thing going on where everyone knew we were watching the wrong video and getting confirmation of this from their partner but no one was actually articulating it. Until E did, the teacher was fetched and we watched a half hour film on comfortable birthing positions. In summary: Your body knows what position it wants to be in.
Other happy topics discussed were breast feeding and the problems that can arise as well as solutions (Go to the hospital's breastfeeding clinic). The teacher gave an interesting anti-formula talk. Essentially, formula companies are desperate to get into hospitals as parents will naturally assume that whatever brand the hospital uses must be the best and buy it when they go home. This is not necessarily so. When Nestle was the biggest annual financial donor to the TEGH, the arrangement was that they would also supply the hospital with unlimited free formula. When the hospital became baby friendly with a mandate to actively encourage and promote breastfeeding, Nestle pulled both its formula and funding.
Mothers in the class were also strongly encouraged to attend post-natal classes once their babies were born. The TEGH has pre-registered E for these classes which start on September 10. 3-12 days before she's due. Thank you, TEGH.
In conclusion, dear reader, you may be a little confused by what was written previously - September 10? 3-12 days before her due date? The mid-wives have assessed where E is at and figure she will be giving birth between the 13th & 22nd. Further appointments will clarify this all in due time.
Except the connecter cables to the DVD player TV weren't working properly and caused her more anguish. My social worker side came out, wanting to plead with her to cancel the night but, due to frustration and annoyance with the whole shebang, I did not. I figured maybe some one else would. But no one did. So we had class.
E&I had decided this would be our make-or-break class. Spoiler: We chose break. Double spoiler: But we're going back next week because pillow/mat week will be epic!
We watched three happy videos (Her words) to help lighten the mood. The first was on post-pardum depression which writes its own joke.
Then a second video so bland that neither of us remember what it was about. Something to do with gel being put in the baby's eyes.
After the break, video number three was a repeat. The teacher had left the class and there was that whole awkward thing going on where everyone knew we were watching the wrong video and getting confirmation of this from their partner but no one was actually articulating it. Until E did, the teacher was fetched and we watched a half hour film on comfortable birthing positions. In summary: Your body knows what position it wants to be in.
Other happy topics discussed were breast feeding and the problems that can arise as well as solutions (Go to the hospital's breastfeeding clinic). The teacher gave an interesting anti-formula talk. Essentially, formula companies are desperate to get into hospitals as parents will naturally assume that whatever brand the hospital uses must be the best and buy it when they go home. This is not necessarily so. When Nestle was the biggest annual financial donor to the TEGH, the arrangement was that they would also supply the hospital with unlimited free formula. When the hospital became baby friendly with a mandate to actively encourage and promote breastfeeding, Nestle pulled both its formula and funding.
Mothers in the class were also strongly encouraged to attend post-natal classes once their babies were born. The TEGH has pre-registered E for these classes which start on September 10. 3-12 days before she's due. Thank you, TEGH.
In conclusion, dear reader, you may be a little confused by what was written previously - September 10? 3-12 days before her due date? The mid-wives have assessed where E is at and figure she will be giving birth between the 13th & 22nd. Further appointments will clarify this all in due time.
27.7.10
Home Birthing Class
Ever thought you were 100% certain about something only to have an experience that makes you even more certain? That happened to me last night in home birthing class.
The first thing the class had going for it was a great spread of fruit, veg, cheese, crackers, hummus and organic lemonade. Unlike the TEGH classes, this was free and had snacks. Midwives Clinic: 1; TEGH: 0
The first part consisted of a free form discussion where a history of home birthing was given, followed by an extensive question and answer session which dealt with myths, concerns, some fairly hostile questions but mainly curious people getting straightforward answers. While the instructor clearly had her agenda, it was never pushed on us and focused a lot on holistic ways to deal with any complications that would arise. Discussions about labour addressed pain but never in a fearful, medicalized way unlike the bloody single-mindedness of of out prenatal teacher. Midwives Clinic 2; TEGH 0
The second part had a couple come in to talk about their experience with a home birth. They were friendly, engaging and honest. Their home birth did not go without any problems when their daughter was born with the cord around its neck. What they made clear was the speed, efficiency and professionalism of the midwives attending her. The couple also had a fantastic piece of advice:
To be flexible with your home birth and prepare for the possibility that you may have to go to the hospital or that you may feel that you can't go on without an epidural and to not feel like a failure should this happen, but understand that you are listening to your body and doing what is right for you. In a sense, this is why home birth only makes sense; in a normal, health pregnancy, there is no need for a hospital when there are professionals able to deliver children safely in your home environment.
As the prenatal instructor at the TEGH said the other week, "You want to give birth in the same environment that you make love in." I can't speak for everyone, but I've never made love in a hospital. Midwives Clinic 3; TEGH 0
Hat trick.
Shutout.
The first thing the class had going for it was a great spread of fruit, veg, cheese, crackers, hummus and organic lemonade. Unlike the TEGH classes, this was free and had snacks. Midwives Clinic: 1; TEGH: 0
The first part consisted of a free form discussion where a history of home birthing was given, followed by an extensive question and answer session which dealt with myths, concerns, some fairly hostile questions but mainly curious people getting straightforward answers. While the instructor clearly had her agenda, it was never pushed on us and focused a lot on holistic ways to deal with any complications that would arise. Discussions about labour addressed pain but never in a fearful, medicalized way unlike the bloody single-mindedness of of out prenatal teacher. Midwives Clinic 2; TEGH 0
The second part had a couple come in to talk about their experience with a home birth. They were friendly, engaging and honest. Their home birth did not go without any problems when their daughter was born with the cord around its neck. What they made clear was the speed, efficiency and professionalism of the midwives attending her. The couple also had a fantastic piece of advice:
To be flexible with your home birth and prepare for the possibility that you may have to go to the hospital or that you may feel that you can't go on without an epidural and to not feel like a failure should this happen, but understand that you are listening to your body and doing what is right for you. In a sense, this is why home birth only makes sense; in a normal, health pregnancy, there is no need for a hospital when there are professionals able to deliver children safely in your home environment.
As the prenatal instructor at the TEGH said the other week, "You want to give birth in the same environment that you make love in." I can't speak for everyone, but I've never made love in a hospital. Midwives Clinic 3; TEGH 0
Hat trick.
Shutout.
25.7.10
Prenatal Class #3
E&I have been talking a lot about the classes thus far and she pretty much hit the nail on the head the other day when she made the observation that the hospital is making pregnancy sound like a disease and that the medicalized steps surrounding childbirth is their way to cure you of this affliction. As a result, anything positive that can come out of the experience of bringing life into the world is relegated to the back of a long line of pain, fear, drugs and pain.
In more positive news, the teacher & our fellow classmates have really grown on me.
(I skipped the breastfeeding class as I've made the assumption [Never a good idea, I know] that I won't be doing too much breastfeeding. Based on what I got from E, breastfeeding a baby is a lot like eating a hamburger except that you're the hamburger.)
This week's class was on pain management & cesarians.
The pain management portion explored all the ways that medicine will make you feel better without mentioning that there exists any (not even one) other methods to cope. Prenatal class continues to play up the tremendous amount of pain that a woman will experience without any reassurance whatsoever other than 'we're really good at sticking this needle into your spine.' One the other hand, some of the drugs they offer sound really good and, should we end up in a hospital, I will seek out ways to get the nurses to administer them to me.
A fun game E&I will play during the birth: Tell me when you'd have the epidural if you were actually having one. I'm curious to know if there will even be a point at which she regrets it. I suspect there won't in spite of class basically saying that the pain is so intense, so constant and lasts for such a long time that any non-medical pain management is simply not conceivable.
Throughout the classes the length of time a first-time mother will spend in labour has been at odds with what the literature we've been reading, as well as what the midwives have been telling us. At this class we realized that the reason why is that epidurals add to length of time a woman is in labour. In effect, by utilizing medical pain management, you are making it harder on your own body as well as that of the baby.
Part two was cesarian section. I saw a video of one a few years back at school and, once the video started playing, braced myself for a bunch of goo spilling out of a woman's stomach, assuming they would show one too, this being a prenatal class and all. Instead, the cesarian was shown as a sterile, Sesame Street-type cartoon where there was no blood or fluid and the baby was delivered by the giant, gloved Hand of God.
The most insulting part of this was the family they chose the depict in the video was the only one planning a holistic non-medicalized birth; in effect pressing home the point even more strongly that anything you try that is different to the medical model is doomed to failure.
Home birth class on Monday (Assuming it's not cancelled. Again). It'll be interesting to see if I come away from it with less snark.
In more positive news, the teacher & our fellow classmates have really grown on me.
(I skipped the breastfeeding class as I've made the assumption [Never a good idea, I know] that I won't be doing too much breastfeeding. Based on what I got from E, breastfeeding a baby is a lot like eating a hamburger except that you're the hamburger.)
This week's class was on pain management & cesarians.
The pain management portion explored all the ways that medicine will make you feel better without mentioning that there exists any (not even one) other methods to cope. Prenatal class continues to play up the tremendous amount of pain that a woman will experience without any reassurance whatsoever other than 'we're really good at sticking this needle into your spine.' One the other hand, some of the drugs they offer sound really good and, should we end up in a hospital, I will seek out ways to get the nurses to administer them to me.
A fun game E&I will play during the birth: Tell me when you'd have the epidural if you were actually having one. I'm curious to know if there will even be a point at which she regrets it. I suspect there won't in spite of class basically saying that the pain is so intense, so constant and lasts for such a long time that any non-medical pain management is simply not conceivable.
Throughout the classes the length of time a first-time mother will spend in labour has been at odds with what the literature we've been reading, as well as what the midwives have been telling us. At this class we realized that the reason why is that epidurals add to length of time a woman is in labour. In effect, by utilizing medical pain management, you are making it harder on your own body as well as that of the baby.
Part two was cesarian section. I saw a video of one a few years back at school and, once the video started playing, braced myself for a bunch of goo spilling out of a woman's stomach, assuming they would show one too, this being a prenatal class and all. Instead, the cesarian was shown as a sterile, Sesame Street-type cartoon where there was no blood or fluid and the baby was delivered by the giant, gloved Hand of God.
The most insulting part of this was the family they chose the depict in the video was the only one planning a holistic non-medicalized birth; in effect pressing home the point even more strongly that anything you try that is different to the medical model is doomed to failure.
Home birth class on Monday (Assuming it's not cancelled. Again). It'll be interesting to see if I come away from it with less snark.
15.7.10
Prenatal Class #2
Excruciating pain.
Intense pain, burning pain.
Pain, pain, pain.
Now let's watch a video:
Pain, pain, pain.
Take your epidural!
Pain, pain, pain.
Took a tour of the birthing centre and made us wonder how far have we come since Mad Men?
I realized I spend too much time in hospitals.
Tonights class was about as meaningless as this entry.
Intense pain, burning pain.
Pain, pain, pain.
Now let's watch a video:
Pain, pain, pain.
Take your epidural!
Pain, pain, pain.
Took a tour of the birthing centre and made us wonder how far have we come since Mad Men?
I realized I spend too much time in hospitals.
Tonights class was about as meaningless as this entry.
8.7.10
Prenatal Class #1
Things I learned at prenatal class:
- If you don't sleep with the baby in your room for at least the first six months, it will die.
- If you install bumpers on the crib too early, your baby will die.
- If you give your baby a thick blanket, it will die.
- It is not uncommon to dream about rabbits when you're pregnant.
- A rolling pin is a sensible item to bring with you to the hospital when giving birth.
It's extremely disappointing that E&I couldn't get in to any of the pre-natal classes offered by our midwives and had to settle on the classes offered by the Toronto East. Going to it tonight feels a lot like showing up to one of her office functions and realizing how little I have in common with everyone in the room. Everyone seemed really nice but our beliefs were just a little too whacked out and our personalities not quite square enough to jive with the room.
It was a bit like being part of a group of adults sent to take grade 5 sex ed and watching them giggle when the teacher said words like 'penis,' 'vagina' and 'ejaculation.' Granted, it's the first of six classes but overall it has re-enforced our beliefs that we're on the right track doing things our way and that having a home birth is the right decision.
While watching a video of a woman giving birth, I saw a placenta for the first time and couldn't help but feel that it looked kinda gross and that maybe turning it into a fry up wasn't such a good idea. Later, when the nurse was describing rolling one out in a tray to make sure it had completely detached it's self, I couldn't help but think about it sizzling in a skillet in garlic, olive oil & lemon juice. A home birth would facilitate the quick cooking and consuming of the placenta so now I really don't know what I'll do.
Home birth classes on Monday should help me decide.
This week's homework: Ask any fathers; if you were to become a father again, what would you do differently this time around? Any takers?
- If you don't sleep with the baby in your room for at least the first six months, it will die.
- If you install bumpers on the crib too early, your baby will die.
- If you give your baby a thick blanket, it will die.
- It is not uncommon to dream about rabbits when you're pregnant.
- A rolling pin is a sensible item to bring with you to the hospital when giving birth.
It's extremely disappointing that E&I couldn't get in to any of the pre-natal classes offered by our midwives and had to settle on the classes offered by the Toronto East. Going to it tonight feels a lot like showing up to one of her office functions and realizing how little I have in common with everyone in the room. Everyone seemed really nice but our beliefs were just a little too whacked out and our personalities not quite square enough to jive with the room.
It was a bit like being part of a group of adults sent to take grade 5 sex ed and watching them giggle when the teacher said words like 'penis,' 'vagina' and 'ejaculation.' Granted, it's the first of six classes but overall it has re-enforced our beliefs that we're on the right track doing things our way and that having a home birth is the right decision.
While watching a video of a woman giving birth, I saw a placenta for the first time and couldn't help but feel that it looked kinda gross and that maybe turning it into a fry up wasn't such a good idea. Later, when the nurse was describing rolling one out in a tray to make sure it had completely detached it's self, I couldn't help but think about it sizzling in a skillet in garlic, olive oil & lemon juice. A home birth would facilitate the quick cooking and consuming of the placenta so now I really don't know what I'll do.
Home birth classes on Monday should help me decide.
This week's homework: Ask any fathers; if you were to become a father again, what would you do differently this time around? Any takers?
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