How Henry Got a Magical Carrot

One day Henry and Mr. Pickles the Flying Carpet Horse noticed Miranda Bunny in the garden looking unhappy.

“What’s wrong,” asked Henry.  “You look so sad.”

“This garden is mostly paved,” said Miranda Bunny. “And there is only a very small plot of dirt and those horrible, horrible raccoons keep coming around at night eating everything I plant.  If they keep it up, I shall have to go hungry this Winter.”

“That’s terrible,” said Mr. Pickles.

“What I really need,” said Miranda Bunny, “are some magical greens that could grow me enough food and scare off those horrible, horrible raccoons.”

Henry had an idea.

Later on, he rode Mr. Pickles to the Valuemart and asked the staff if they had and magical greens.  But they didn’t.  And all they could afford were three fiddleheads which had fallen on the ground and gotten run over by a shopping cart.

“Somehow,” suggested Mr. Pickles, “I don’t think those fiddlehead greens have much magic in them.”

But Henry had another idea.

After they had flown home, Henry got out his paints and he and Mr. Pickles painted the magic into the greens.

Henry painted his fiddlehead with orange and blue tiger stripes.

Mr. Pickles painted his fiddlehead yellow with pink and red polka dots.

They had run out of paint for the third fiddlehead so they covered it in glue and rolled it in sawdust.

Miranda Bunny was ecstatic when they presented the magical greens to her.  She was so happy that she gave them each a magical carrot that would improve their eyesight so much that they would be able to see through things.  Right away she planted the fiddleheads.

“But are they magical?” asked Mr. Pickles nervously.

“I sure hope so!” said Henry.

And they were.  From the tiger stripped fiddlehead grew more fiddleheads with orange and blue tiger stripes.  From the polka dotted fiddlehead grew yellow fiddleheads with pink and red polka dots.  But for some reason there were always way more pink polka dots than red.

And from the fiddlehead covered in sawdust grew a vine from which neatly sanded and water resistant planks hung.

Naturally, the horrible, horrible raccoons didn’t know what to make of these strange plants and went back to eating garbage.  Miranda Bunny was able to save up enough food to get her through the winter and all future winters.  She used the planks to make a really great hutch with a bay window and a turret.


Next time: Why Anthony Bourdain is to food as Christopher Hitchens is to God.